Thursday, October 30, 2014

A few things that I learned from my Grandmother!

My Grandmother passed away last week.  It's been such a weird time.  I am emotional, but not in the way that people expect me to be...or maybe it's the exact way that I myself am supposed to be!  Who knows...but I wanted to write about what I learned from my Grandmother.  She was such an interesting woman.  She wasn't the typical making cookies Grandma, but I learned a lot of life lessons from her...without her (or really even myself) knowing it!

1.  Makeup is not scary!
My Grandmother sold Mary Kay for forever!  She even had a car!  I remember one year going with them to see the car at the dealership.  Why we all went...I don't know.  But it's something that I remember.  We have been allowed to wear makeup our whole lives.  If we asked to put some on, my mom would.  It was never...when you are older.  Or any of that nonsense.  So, when it came time that we have our own makeup, it wasn't a huge deal.  There was never a "hooker look" that happens, when kids don't know how to apply makeup or when they go nuts because they aren't allowed to wear it.  It was always there.  Makeup really does make people look better (my opinion and I don't want yours unless it agree's with mine.  Thanks)

2.  That your Significant Other should come first!
In a healthy relationship, I truly believe that your spouse should come first!  It makes for a united front for the kids.  It also shows true love!  My Grandfather would have done anything for my Grandmother.  My dad would do anything for my mom!  Growing up we knew that there was no playing one parent against the other.  There was no Daddy's Girl or Mama's Girl!  We were their girls!  If you have that attitude, then your kids will feel the love trickling down on them!  For the record, family was a very close second!

3.  That if you give your opinion you might not be popular!
My Grandmother gave her opinion!  You might not like it, it might not be what you want to hear...but it was exactly what she thought.  Now, she wouldn't just go up and say "I Don't like your shoes!", but if you said "Do you like my shoes?"  and she didn't like them...she would say No, I don't!  On the flip side, when she thought you did a great job, she told you!  There were no fake compliments, what she said positive or negative...was what she thought!  This is a hard thing to balance and she wasn't perfect at it...but she was always true to herself!

4.  Be able to make fun of yourself!
My Grandmother had a great sense of humor.  I wish I had been older, when she was younger.  She would tell stories, the adults in my family would play games and just laugh.  After my Grandfather passed away, Grandmother did some theatre stuff, including being a stand up comic.  She would tell blonde jokes, which is what she was...and it was funny!  I think a sense of humor is something she passed along (both her and my Grandfather).

5.  How to eat a chip!
My Grandmother was so proper!  You could tell by her fancy clothes and jewelry!  Her hair was always done...she was just a royal figure living in Kansas!  One day my sisters and I were eating chips.  We were grabbing a handful and stuffing them into our mouths like kids do (and sometimes adults) as if at any time, someone was going to come and take the bag away.  Grandmother came up and said "Girls, that is not the proper way to eat chips.  You must break the chip in half and place it on your tongue."  We did it, for her...but then laughed and laughed about it later.  In fact, it's one of the stories I tell when people ask why we call her Grandmother.

6.  Always wake kids up with a song!
My Grandmother always woke us up with the song "Good Morning" from Singing in the Rain.  When we were older there was another song that got played...but it was weird!  "Oh no, you're asleep again"...ha ha ha!  It might be annoying to your kids at that time...but it's something that they will want to do with their kids and it's a story that they will tell for years and years to come!  It might even be one of the greatest memories that they have of you!  Why?  Because my Grandmother took the time to come in and sing us awake.  She didn't let us sleep the day away, but she didn't yell at us to wake up either!  You might not always have the time...nor the desire to do this...and maybe it will only be done with Grandkids...but you should still try to do it!

7.  It's never to late to say I love you!
We knew growing up my Grandmother loved us.  We would all hug goodbye when we left.  We might even say a general, I love you to the whole group as we were piling in the car.  But there weren't very many I love you, Amy's or I love you, Grandmother's.  My parents did that with us, and we do that with my sister's kids...and it's amazing!  When my Grandmother started to get sick, she started to say personal I love you's!  I remember one time I was helping her get into bed and she hugged me extra long and said I love you, Amy!  No one cares when you say it...as long as it's coming from the heart!  It was to me and it's only mine and I love that moment!  It's one that I had forgotten about until about 2 min ago...but now that it's there...it will stay!  Tell people, that you love them often!  But if it's been a while...or you are scared...suck it up, buttercup!  Just say it and start something new!

8.  Do not give up!
My Grandmother and Grandfather were soul mates.  When my Grandfather passed, I think my Grandmother was a little lost at first.  But she didn't give up!  She kept living!  She started doing the theatre stuff, she met Capt. John, she went on cruises and vacations, even after Capt. John passed, she went on!  She is a survivor who does not give up easily!  Was she always happy?  No, but there were moments of happiness!  There were moments that I would not give up for anything these past few years.  Making my Grandmother laugh, telling her I love you, all of these little things that might not have ever happened had she given up on life after my Grandfather passed.

Am I sad that my Grandmother has passed away?  Yes, but I'm way more happy that she is now back with my Grandfather.  Looking as proper as ever!  Wearing a most fabulous outfit with the most perfectly matching jewelry!  Dancing away to their favorite tune and watching as the family passes on story after story, Memory after memory...sharing what we have learned from them on to everyone and anyone who will listen!




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